It took me a lot longer to get to Hamilton than most. I dearly want to send Michael Gorman a ticket, after his racist diss of hip-hop that probably only I remember by now. Ah, well.

I made half a filk after watching the Disney production a while back. The rest is still to be written, I think; I hope it has a better ending for librarianship than for Hamilton. Grateful to the Genius website for making the lyrics available (and copiously annotated).

[Salo:]
There’s nothing like tenure-driven research
Data in the ILS meets data from the teachers
There’s value in the air, you can smell it
And a researcher’s by himself. I’ll let him tell it

[Researcher:]
I hadn’t slept in a week
I was weak, I was awake
You never seen a librarian
More in need of a break
Longing for significance
Missing ROI
That’s when Ms. Value Agenda walked into my life. She said:

[VAL:]
I know you are a professional
I’m so sorry to bother you at home
But I don’t know where to go, and I came here all alone…

[Researcher:]
She said:

[VAL:]
My admin’s doin’ me wrong
Puntin’ me, huntin’ me, defundin’ me…
Suddenly budget’s up and gone
I don’t have the means to go on

[Researcher:]
So I offered her a meal, I offered to break her Big Deal, she said

[VAL:]
You’re too kind, sir

[Researcher:]
I gave her some spreadsheets that I had socked away
She worked a block away, she said:

[VAL:]
This one’s mine, sir

[Researcher:]
Then I said, “Well, I should head back home,”
She turned foxy, she led me to EZProxy
Opened her data boxie and said:

[VAL:]
Stay?

[Researcher:]
Hey…

[VAL:]
Hey…

[Researcher:]
That’s when I began to pray:
ALA, show me how to
Say no to this
I don’t know how to
Say no to this
But my God, the data’s so fresh
And the journal’s saying, “Hell, yes.”

[VAL:]
Whoa…

[Researcher:]
No, show me how to

[Researcher/Ensemble:]
Say no to this

[Researcher:]
I don’t know how to

[Researcher/Ensemble:]
Say no to this

[Researcher:]
In my mind, I’m tryin’ to go

[Ensemble:]
Go! Go! Go!

[Researcher:]
Then the data lake’s online, and I don’t say…

[Ensemble:]
No! No!
Say no to this!
No! No!
Say no to this!
No! No!
Say no to this!
No! No!
Say no to this!

[Researcher:]
I wish I could say that was the last time
I said that last time. It became a pastime…